His Baby Bond by Lee Tobin McClain

Author:Lee Tobin McClain [McClain, Lee Tobin]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Lee Tobin McClain
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

Kendra was glad each time Sara started fussing during the service. It was a welcome distraction from two things—the message, and Zeke.

Sometimes when Sara got restless, Zeke insisted on taking her herself, and when she saw how he was able to comfort her, she felt an unwanted, unreasonable surge of gladness. Even though he was her rival for the baby, she wanted Sara to have a good man like Zeke in her life.

Kendra had been trying all morning to stoke herself back up into anger at Zeke for what had happened the last time they’d been together. Then, she’d been plenty angry. He’d hurt her badly by kissing her like that and then leaving her. The pain of it had kept her awake most of the night.

Somewhere in the cold dawn, though, she’d realized where her anger really belonged—at herself.

She had thrown herself at him, and she couldn’t deny it. The days of being close to Zeke, of getting to know him, of coming to admire his high standards, his intelligence, and his willingness to learn and cooperate in taking care of Sara, all of it had made her feel far more than she should for Zeke.

When he’d shown himself to be so caring about the blows of her past, that, on top of everything else, had melted her defenses, and she had clung to him. She’d even entertained an absurd hope that something could grow between them—some deeper relationship, some commitment.

That hope had died when Zeke had pulled away from her and made it clear he considered kissing her to be a horrible mistake.

Watching Sara as she bounced in Zeke’s arms, Kendra’s confusion grew. She could see that Zeke would be good for Sara. Despite his blind spots about Kendra herself, Zeke was a good man with many resources and a strong sense of responsibility. If possible, she should try to make joint custody work with him.

On the other hand, given their unfortunate attraction, which even now had her admiring the way his sports jacket suited his oh-so broad shoulders, joint custody with Zeke was dangerous. Dangerous to their morality; and deadly dangerous to Kendra’s heart.

As Sara began cooing louder, Zeke carried her out of the sanctuary. Initially Kendra was relieved. It was a chance to stop all this circular thinking about the impossible situation with Zeke.

But then she had nothing to do but listen to the service…and feel awful. Awful, that she’d stopped coming to church; and awful, because she longed to come back to the fold, but she couldn’t.

The New Testament readings focused on Paul’s many persecutions and his strong faith that let him come through trouble with strength and positive power. Pastor Tom looked directly at her when he spoke of drawing near to the Lord in hard times.

Others—great saints—could do that, she supposed. But she was weak. She was looking for someone to blame for all that had happened. Worst of all, when she thought about the possibility of accepting Jesus’s comfort, she felt guilty because of Cleo suffering the torments of the damned for all eternity.

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